Having a week off from Algebra was terrific. I felt ready for class tonight until I got there and discovered the title of our new chapter is QUADRATIC EQUATIONS: FEEL THE PAIN. I felt it, all right. Not over the equations themselves. We tackled those six weeks ago so they aren't total icons of evil. No, the pain came from discovering the existence of the Quadratic Formula. Do you know what it is? I will tell you (or refresh your memory, perhaps).
It's pronounced "x equals negative b plus or minus the square root of b squared minus 4 ac all over 2a." It does not exactly trip off the tongue. And we have to memorize it pronto; we will be using it for the rest of the semester starting with our quiz on Thursday. Oh, we were not a happy class tonight. Everyone was in the depths of despair over the impossibility of remembering all the little fiddly bits. But guess what? I have a special trick which renders this fiendishly non-intuitive formula memorable. I am going to share it with you because no one should ever have to despair over quadratic equations any more than is absolutely necessary. Here's my little secret: sing it to the tune of Pop Goes The Weasel.
x equals negative b
plus or minus the square root
of b squared minus 4 ac
all over 2a.
Isn't that great? Tell all your friends. You're welcome.
The Index
Next Incarnation