Week 2: It's official, I've lost two pounds. This is the Weight Watchers' ideal. I'm pleased, but it's such a drop in the bucket that it's hard to feel super happy about it. I'm trying, I am, but it's hard to get used to this new life.
It's been an educational two weeks, though. I've learned quite a lot about what to eat and what to leave alone. The point system is a bit confusing, but I'm getting the hang of it. All I have to do is never again eat beef, dairy products, or salad dressing.
Or, you know, eat the low fat version, not that there's a low fat version of beef but you know what I mean. It's really important. You're all, "Yeah, baby, yeah! Three ounces of shrimp 2 points, two cups of lettuce 0 points, two ounces broccoli 0 points, this is so great, two ounces cucumber 0 points, three ounces carrots 1 point, gosh this Shrimp Louie isn't adding up to anything and yet it's so filling, egg whites 0.5 points, two ounces Thousand Island dressing 6 POINTS? WHAT? NOOO!"
No wonder I never lost any weight by eating salads. Jeez. Suddenly this diet staple turns into a heavy liability. And let's not even talk about cheese. Cheese is my favorite food. It's the one thing that's always in my refrigerator in one form or another. I've had a lifelong relationship here, it's heartbreaking to turn my back on it. But cheese, you're no good for me. I'm giving you back your class ring. We can't see each other any more. You cost me too much in points.
Meat in general is not that hard to give up. Chicken, eh, turkey, once a year, pork, whatever, beef, it's okay. I don't eat it much, although I do love patty melts. Oh god, let's not talk about patty melts with the juicy beef and the cheesy meltiness and the onions and...cheese! Come back, we can work it out! What? Date your cousin Low Fat? The squeaky one? Ew, gross.
No, I'm better off this way. And frankly, if I must choose only one source of protein I'll take, er, actually I'll take two forms of protein but they both come from the same place: fish and shellfish. I love fish, and clams, and crab, and shrimp, and mussels. Sushi, I love sushi nigh unto madness. I think eating all the seafood I want is a very fair trade for cheese, actually.
Goodbye, cheese. It was beautiful while it lasted.
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