I want people to have respect for other cultures, and for other creatures. I want women to be first class citizens everywhere. I want to be an advocate for conservation, preservation, understanding and respect for those creatures in our world which cannot speak for themselves. I want to wipe out the attitude that allows a human to abuse an animal or destroy pristine wilderness in pursuit of profit.

I'm the first to admit I'm openly disrespectful of others at times, inclined to be partisan, an inconsistent lover of animals since I wear leather and eat meat. Nonetheless, these are strong, recurring desires. If I could convince people to spay and neuter their animals, if I could write something that changed a person's mind about buying a product that takes a high toll in wildlife populations or ecosystems, if I could show someone how little human nature differs around the globe, if I could change laws or customs that encourage men to belittle women, that would make me feel like I was of some use in this world.

I have no idea how to go about this. I suppose the best place to start is by living my values. I do fairly well in this regard. Anyone who spends time around me knows I'm a feminist, a passionate believer in animal rights and wildlife conservation, someone who recycles and reuses, who has never owned a car, who pays attention to world issues and is careful about what she buys, who supports groups and companies that try to make a difference in these areas. There are even countries I won't spend tourist dollars in because of their human rights or animal hunting record, much as I'd like to visit China, Myanmar, and Norway. However, I could always do better or more to bring myself in line with my ideals.

I could also write more in different forums about the things I believe in. I have the right job for encouraging respect and interest in foreign cultures, of course. As a travel agent I counsel, educate, and enthuse. I infect people with my passion for seeing the world. I believe travel is right up there with literacy for changing the way a person thinks. Travel is good for you, it throws you on your own resources and clarifies a lot about how you deal with disrupted routines and communication issues. I have something good to say about any destination you can name. I constantly assure people the French like Americans just fine, there is no reason to avoid an entire country if some sort of political strife is occuring several hundred miles away from the tourist spots, they are more likely to get mugged in their hometown than in Name-A-Big-City, and the ever popular educational information that Alaska is a state, as is Hawaii, and they don't need a passport to go to either. I also have to remind people that Canada is a foreign country and they need proof of citizenship to re-enter the U.S., but I'll probably never be able to convince people that a library card isn't proof of citizenship. Some tasks will take more than one lifetime.

As for my attributes, skills, and talents, they surprise me. They also tell me why I tend to fail in one area but not another. Need an intuitive, creative thinker? That's me, as long as you don't expect me to see the big picture right away. I need to work out all the details and then I can start to see where everything else fits in. Were you expecting me to be a leader? Bad idea; I'm a martinet, very black and white. It's my way or the highway. Think I need micro managing? Extra bad idea! I need to be given my tasks and then left to get on with it. Want me to sacrifice now for a big pay-off in the future? Maybe. Probably not. I need instant gratification of some sort: a response, a result, or I give up. Long term plans are not my forte and the longer I have to wait for something the more likely it is that I'll get lost in daydreams where life is just perfect, and never do any of the basic groundwork to make it all happen.

That's what I've been thinking about lately. What good am I, really? Am I making a difference in this world, and is it enough to simply live in accordance with my values? I'm not sure yet. I'm still working on who I am and all the ways that is expressed. But I'm feeling much better about everything. I see a lot of evidence that I do make a difference, locally if not globally. I will just keep repeating: the personal is the political.

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