I've been trying to write a resume that won't make a dog laugh, and making phone calls to prospective employers (what a grim phrase), and generally attempting to act employable. Alas, I was turned down for 6 out of 6 agencies I contacted. I don't much mind, really, but it's disappointing to think one has passed from "too little" experience to "too much" without ever stopping in the hypothetical middle of "just right."
I went to the mall on Friday to look for interview clothes. I have discovered a shocking thing. I am exactly the wrong size. Yes! I am a size 17. For those who don't spend a lot of time muttering bitterly over clothing designers I shall explain that your basic department store offers petite, regular, and large size sections. I have no business in the Petite section. Large is generally anything from size 18 on up. Regular, ha ha, clothes run from size 6-16 with virtually nothing available above size 12. All the store buyers are either size 8 or male. You see my problem.
Okay, but what really cheeses me off is that larger size clothes are invariably either hideous or expensive. I'm sorry, but just because I like to eat more than I like to exercise does not mean my taste went out the window. I get kind of huffy with designers like Liz Claiborne (who has a large size clothing line called Elizabeth, get it?) and don't offer the same tasteful colors and styles as the smaller line, choosing instead to offer brighter colors and different cuts. Hello! Being overweight is not a crime! Not all large women like wearing a tent, wake up! Bright colors are not a bad thing, but purple and loud florals are not invariably a delightful option. We're not circus people just because we're not slim.
Well, anyway, I roamed around looking for nice rayon and linen clothes to wear at an interview, and I didn't find anything especially attractive, so I thought I'd look for a pair of jeans. I grabbed some Levis and some designer jeans and started trying them on. That's when I discovered my imprecise measurements. I have too large a waist for a 16 but too small for an 18. It's the reason I tend to wear elastic-waisted pants. However, to my way of thinking, jeans need to look like jeans and not a strange hybrid of sweatpants and denim. The Levis were just not quite right, and at $40 a pair you do want your pants to fit right. I eyed the designer jeans. I checked the price: cheaper than the Levis. I'd accidentally grabbed a pair of Petite Length instead of Average, but I thought I'd see. To my complete surprise, they were perfect. I looked at the designer's tag. My jeans problem had been solved by Delta Burke, a plump and somewhat short actress who surely knows the pain of the Large Sizes section in the department stores.
I'm wearing my new jeans right now. Because they're a smidge large around the waist, sitting down is completely comfortable. I may be a size 17, but as long as I can get the petite length inseam, I can choose between the loose and the snug fits and not have to take up my pants. I feel so happy to have found clothing for my build that I might even be able to go out looking for those interview clothes again soon. After all, sooner or later someone's bound to want a travel agent with 5 years experience. I think I'll see if Delta does rayon.
