I'm cheering up slowly, using one of my traditional methods: a large cappuccino, and Weird Al Yankovic on the CD player. I want to marry him in my next life. Of course, I also want to marry Marcus on Babylon 5, Smokey from Little, Big, and Dave Barry. I'm planning on a busy afterlife.

This friend I talk to almost every night online has been talking about his lovelife, or lack thereof. We're trying to pinpoint what he wants and where he's gone wrong in the past, in hopes of figuring out how he can meet someone that won't screw him over. We spending a lot of time talking about what women want. The other night, he suggested a scenario which he felt women would find irresistable: a tall, good looking, well-muscled man doing the dishes. I demurred, advising him that pretty much any man doing the dishes was irresistable. And most women I know would take communication skills over muscles. Of course, as I pointed out, most women I know are my age. The college crowd might feel differently.

Personally, if I were confronted by a really good looking, muscular man in my kitchen doing my dishes, I wouldn't feel flirtatious. I'd be wondering when all his girlfriends or boyfriends were about to descend on the house to sweep him away. I have no faith that I could attract such a being. On the other hand, I'm quite certain that I could attract an intelligent, amusing, and articulate man no matter what he looked like. And I think that's the kind of attributes most women that my friend could fall in love with would be looking for; all things he can offer.

We'll have to just hope he likes doing dishes. Making a decent cappuccino couldn't hurt, either.